Nothing to Say. Something to Do

The photos below are from The Seattle Times. They were taken as people mourned the killing of four police officers in Washington state.





Mark Hall, the leader of Casting Crowns, wrote a great book called "Lifestories". In the chapter "Love Them Like Jesus", Mark writes about several boys in his youth group dealing with the death of their friend's father. They had no idea what to say to their grieving friend. Mark gave them a simple yet powerful suggestion:

"Guys, you've just got to go love him," I said. "Don't think you have to have all the answers. You don't have to make some great spiritual pronouncement when you see him. You just have to be there for him and tell him you're sorry for what happened to his daddy and that you love him. And then you just hang out with him. You've just got to love him like Jesus-love him like He would, and love him to Jesus."

Later in the chapter Mark writes:

"All of the self-induced burden to make everything better creates a fear that causes us to pull away from our hurting friends. We heap all the pressure on ourselves. This is true even in a friendship between believers because we always want to have a spiritual answer for everything. We want to have the bow tied at the end. We want the quick resolution and immediate assurance that everything is going to be fine. Guess what? Sometimes it's not just fine. Sometimes you don't understand what's going on, and you're not going to know for a while, if at all."

"I had learned during a few such scenarios that there is really nothing to say. But there is something to do."

What should we DO when someone we know and love is grieving?

"You don't need the answers to all of life's questions. Just know that He loves them and stay by their side. Love them like Jesus."

(Today's post is part of the Blog Carnival hosted by Peter Pollock on "Grief")

What Did We Serve?

On Thanksgiving day we served the homeless of Daytona Beach, Florida Thanksgiving dinner. We served turkey, gravy, mashed potatoes, green beans, rolls, pumpkin pie and more. We served about 80 people. Along with the food, what else did we serve on Thanksgiving day?

Safety: We served 2 hours of safety. Homeless men and women live in constant fear of having their property stolen, being hit over the head or other physical and verbal abuse. It was great to see our homeless guests sitting down and relaxing. You could see in their eyes that they felt safe.

Listening: We served the gift of listening. The homeless want us to look into their eyes and actually listen to what they have to say. I was so impressed with how many of our volunteers actually sat down, listened and entered the real world of our homeless guests.

They weren't called Bums: We served respect. On the streets they are called "bums" or "losers". When our dinner guests arrived we asked what their name was so we could say, "Bill, what would you like to drink?" or "Diane, would you like more gravy?" The homeless have names just like you and me.

Love: We served love. There isn't a lot of love in the lives of the homeless. After the day was over I smelled like cigarettes, alcohol, body order and urine. Why? I hugged them. Have you ever hugged someone and they didn't want you to stop or they didn't want you to let go? That happened many times as I hugged the homeless on Thanksgiving day. I saw volunteers putting hands on their shoulders and shaking their hands. We wanted our guests to feel welcomed and loved.

The Gospel: We tried to serve the Gospel. The homeless HEAR the Gospel day after day just to get a free sandwich. I pray that our homeless guests SAW the Gospel while we were serving food, safety, respect and love. Isn't that the kind of Gospel we all need to SEE on Thanksgiving day and everyday?
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Thanks to all of the volunteers and donations from First United Methodist Church, Tomoka Christian Church, Covenant United Methodist Church and my friends from Twitter: @ChristineBlake, @PaganKelly, @JohnBeattyArt, @BtotheEtotheN @EdenSalon and @BebeLeStrange68

Thanksgiving Movie Tradition

Every Thanksgiving we watch "Home For The Holidays". It was directed by Jodie Foster. There are so many magic moments in this comedy. The clip below comes near the end of the movie. It contains a touching moment between father (Charles Durning) and daughter (Holly Hunter). My father died suddenly when I was 19 years old. As I watch the clip below I realize that I mourn the fact that I never had the opportunity to have an adult relationship with my father. It doesn't have to play out the same way with my daughter and son. This Thanksgiving I'm thankful for many things. One of the things I am thankful for is a God of second chances.

I forget

Today God led me to Halifax Urban Ministries on Bay Street in downtown Daytona Beach, FL. What did I see? Hundreds of men and women standing in line. I saw the old and the young. I saw the poor, the broken, the unemployed and the disabled. Some couldn't stand. Some sat or leaned while they waited in line. They all had one thing in common. They were all standing in line to get ONE free frozen turkey.

I forget about the people who need to stand in line for free turkeys. I forget how it would feel to stand in line to get a free frozen turkey. I forget about how much I have. I forget about how much I waste and throw away. I forget about how much money I have in my wallet. I forget about the job I have. I forget about the home that I live in. I forget that I have two cars and a motorcycle. I forget about how much food is in the pantry and in the fridge. I forget how much God has given me. I forget and then God helps me to remember.

What have you forgotten? What do you need to remember?

Which One Are You?

Which One Are You?

 ^9-12He told his next story to some who were complacently pleased with themselves over their moral performance and looked down their noses at the common people: "Two men went up to the Temple to pray, one a Pharisee, the other a tax man. The Pharisee posed and prayed like this: 'Oh, God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, crooks, adulterers, or, heaven forbid, like this tax man. I fast twice a week and tithe on all my income.'

 ¹³"Meanwhile the tax man, slumped in the shadows, his face in his hands, not daring to look up, said, 'God, give mercy. Forgive me, a sinner.'"

 ¹⁴Jesus commented, "This tax man, not the other, went home made right with God. If you walk around with your nose in the air, you're going to end up flat on your face, but if you're content to be simply yourself, you will become more than yourself." (Luke 18:10-14, The Message)

Which one of the people in the story above describes you? Which one do you want to be? Which one are you like the most? Which one are you like the least?

Me? Most of the time I think I've got it all figured out. I'm the one that "gets it" and others don't. I'm the one that postures and positions myself to look good in front of others. I have actually said things like this to my wife, "You know honey, I know that I'm not that great of a husband but have you heard about what Dan has been doing to his wife and family?" I want to be more like the tax man. He examined his heart and admitted his sin. He humbled himself. He wasn't a poser. He confessed his sin to God and to others.

In my opinion, the tax man is the person that Jesus describes below:

"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God"--Matthew 5:8

I want to be more like the tax man.

Get Primal

Got a tweet yesterday giving me the opportunity to download a chapter of "Primal: A Quest for the Lost Soul of Christianity" by pastor Mark Batterson. After reading one chapter I can't wait to get my hands on the book. Here are some quotes and thoughts from Mark's book.

"An enormous amount of damage is done in the name of Christian living by bad Bible reading."

"The Bible is the place where God bares His soul. And it’s no Sunday school flannelgraph. It’ll make you wince and cringe and blush. But it’ll also make you marvel. Nothing speaks to the soul like Scripture. It’s the way God reveals His wonders in written form."

"Not unlike the radio waves that transmit voices and pictures and signals at different frequencies, the Spirit of God is always broadcasting.But we’ve got to tune in to His frequency."

"When we open the Bible, it’s like God opens His mouth. That’s how we get on His frequency. That’s how we tune in to His voice."

"I recently read about a musical trainer hired to work with opera singers who could not hit certain notes within a particular octave even though the notes fell within their vocal range. It was a musical mystery. The trainer did extensive testing on their vocal chords, but he couldn’t find any reason why they couldn’t hit those notes. Then, on a whim, he tested their hearing. And what he discovered is that these opera singers could not sing a note they could not hear. The problem wasn’t singing. The problem was hearing."

"Until you hear the voice of God, you won’t be able to sing His song. Why? Because you’re out of tune."

"When you love someone, you love the sound of his or her voice. If you’ve ever had a long-distance relationship, you know whereof I write. A relationship with God is a lot like that. To love God is to love His voice. Or to put it another way, to love God is to love His Word."

"There are days when reading through a book like Leviticus feels like driving through Nebraska. No offense, Nebraskans, but long stretches of flat land can be mind-numbing. Truth be told, some parts of the Bible are more exciting than others. Is that okay to say?"

Download your free chapter by "clicking" here

You can follow Mark Batterson on Twitter by "clicking" here.

You can follow Mark's blog by "clicking" here.

I've Changed The Name

For as long as I can remember I have been beating up on myself. I don't need critics. I am my own worst critic.

Today my "talking doctor" said, "Mike, look at what you've accomplished! Celebrate. Stop beating up on yourself."

I've got a lot to celebrate. This Friday will mark 30 days since I have had a drink of beer, wine or any type of alcohol. That is something to celebrate!

I am going to start the "celebration" early by changing the name of this blog. This blog used to have the title "Mike Is Messed Up". That title has been replaced by "Mike In Progress". I'm not perfect. I've got a long way to go. I'm on a journey. I'm a painting that is not finished. I'm a work in progress.

"I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I'm off and running, and I'm not turning back."

Philippians 3:13-14 (The Message)

Whatever there be of progress in life comes not through adaptation but through daring.

Henry Miller